All I can do is shake my head

and roll my eyes...

My husband...

Really I could stop there, but for your sake, I'll keep typing.

This weekend, I handed my husband one of my shopping bags to throw away. As he was folding it up to throw away, he said, "I never understood why they named a store A Pea in the Poo." I stopped what I was doing, looked at him to see if he was serious, and of course, he was. "Do you mean A Pea in the POD?" I asked. He uncrumpled the bag, looked at the name, and said, "Well, that 'd' looks like an 'o.' Hopefully, he never told someone, "Yesterday, I took my wife shopping to A Pea in the Poo."

This morning, I walked out of the garage behind John to get in the car and noticed some bright yellow stitching on the back of his suit. "Honey!" I exclaimed, "You wore that suit to your sales conference with the pleats still tacked down??" To which he replied, "Those are supposed to be there." I just shook my head and went back inside for some scissors. I came back and started cutting them off. "I don't think you are supposed to take those off," he said. "You seriously don't believe me that these aren't supposed to be here?" I asked him. "I still can't believe you wore your suit like this at your sales conference." I said while I cut. "Well, at least it was dark," he replied. "Dark inside a hotel with lights on, Honey?" Pause. "Well, it's not like I was wearing the suit with the tags still on it," he said. "John, it's basically the same thing."

This is the same suit he thought he could return to Dillard's AFTER he'd had it altered. He didn't believe me when I laughed at him and told him that you can't do that. "Honey, it's like me cutting off the sleeve of this shirt and trying to return it," I said. "Well, someone else can buy the suit and have it altered to fit them," he replied. (SIDE NOTE: My husband is a very unique size (like, hard to shop for size), loooong torso, shoooort legs, so all I could do was roll my eyes at that comment when he made it) He called the store anyway, just to have them confirm what I told him.

I think John and I would be good candidates for Jerry Seinfeld's new show, The Marriage Ref. I think our conversations like this would make for some good TV...

I'm telling you, never a dull moment at our house.