I've been in bed awake for over an hour, and finally decided to get up and do something semi-productive. I kept thinking of random experiences, and thought I would blog about them.
It was Thanksgiving morning and I was at WalMart. I turned the corner to walk down the flour/sugar/spice aisle and I saw a skinny older man with only a few things in his cart inspecting the spices. I do have a soft spot for older people. I can't honk at them when they are being bad drivers, because I picture my grandparents, and I know Grandma drives slow, and I don't want someone honking at her.
Anyway.
About five seconds after seeing this man, glancing at him, glancing at his cart, a thought popped in my head, "You should invite him to dinner."
I'm pretty sure I stopped in my tracks.
Some people talk of your inner voice, or your soul's voice, but I refer to it as the spirit, and it was speaking to me.
"What?!?!"
I turned around to face the flour as if it required much studying to figure out what brand to buy, and carried on an internal debate.
"I don't even know him."
The thought came again, "You should invite him to dinner."
My heart started thumping, and I may have started to get sweaty palms, I don't remember, but my body was reacting.
"I don't even know him. That is weird. Asking a complete stranger if he wants to come over for dinner? He'll think I'm crazy. I think it's crazy. What???"
"You should invite him to dinner."
"He could be a sex offender for all I know!" (Okay if you could have seen this man, you would laugh at me for thinking this, because he had the sweetest countenance about him, or you might say aura, but I really did think that.)
He turned down another aisle, and my heart was still racing, my mind still debating.
I went to go down the next aisle, passing him, still having the same thoughts, and still feeling like I should ask him to dinner.
The debate won. "That is just too weird," I thought and moved down another aisle, not seeing him again in the store.
I continued my shopping feeling... bad, and confused. What would make me want to invite a total stranger to eat with us? That is sooo not me.
I didn't really think about it again after I left WalMart.
About a month later, I was sitting in church waiting for it to start when my attention was drawn to a woman with obvious health issues being escorted down the aisle in the chapel. When I saw her escort, her husband I assumed, my heart might have stopped for a second. It was him, the sweet looking man shopping in WalMart.
I had never seen them at church before, or never noticed, (I hadn't been living here that long, okay over a year...) and had not recognized him at WalMart.
I can't describe how disappointed I was in myself, or the pit in my stomach I felt. I mean, he may not have accepted had I invited him anyway, because let's face it, it would be a little crazy to have a stranger approach you in WalMart and invite you to Thanksgiving dinner. But, maybe he just needed to hear someone ask him something nice? Whatever the reason, I didn't listen, and I know it. Whenever I see him in church, I'm reminded of the clear instruction I received, and the internal debate I had that followed.
If there is one thing I hope to help my children learn in this life, it is to recognize those promptings, and respond accordingly.
It was Thanksgiving morning and I was at WalMart. I turned the corner to walk down the flour/sugar/spice aisle and I saw a skinny older man with only a few things in his cart inspecting the spices. I do have a soft spot for older people. I can't honk at them when they are being bad drivers, because I picture my grandparents, and I know Grandma drives slow, and I don't want someone honking at her.
Anyway.
About five seconds after seeing this man, glancing at him, glancing at his cart, a thought popped in my head, "You should invite him to dinner."
I'm pretty sure I stopped in my tracks.
Some people talk of your inner voice, or your soul's voice, but I refer to it as the spirit, and it was speaking to me.
"What?!?!"
I turned around to face the flour as if it required much studying to figure out what brand to buy, and carried on an internal debate.
"I don't even know him."
The thought came again, "You should invite him to dinner."
My heart started thumping, and I may have started to get sweaty palms, I don't remember, but my body was reacting.
"I don't even know him. That is weird. Asking a complete stranger if he wants to come over for dinner? He'll think I'm crazy. I think it's crazy. What???"
"You should invite him to dinner."
"He could be a sex offender for all I know!" (Okay if you could have seen this man, you would laugh at me for thinking this, because he had the sweetest countenance about him, or you might say aura, but I really did think that.)
He turned down another aisle, and my heart was still racing, my mind still debating.
I went to go down the next aisle, passing him, still having the same thoughts, and still feeling like I should ask him to dinner.
The debate won. "That is just too weird," I thought and moved down another aisle, not seeing him again in the store.
I continued my shopping feeling... bad, and confused. What would make me want to invite a total stranger to eat with us? That is sooo not me.
I didn't really think about it again after I left WalMart.
About a month later, I was sitting in church waiting for it to start when my attention was drawn to a woman with obvious health issues being escorted down the aisle in the chapel. When I saw her escort, her husband I assumed, my heart might have stopped for a second. It was him, the sweet looking man shopping in WalMart.
I had never seen them at church before, or never noticed, (I hadn't been living here that long, okay over a year...) and had not recognized him at WalMart.
I can't describe how disappointed I was in myself, or the pit in my stomach I felt. I mean, he may not have accepted had I invited him anyway, because let's face it, it would be a little crazy to have a stranger approach you in WalMart and invite you to Thanksgiving dinner. But, maybe he just needed to hear someone ask him something nice? Whatever the reason, I didn't listen, and I know it. Whenever I see him in church, I'm reminded of the clear instruction I received, and the internal debate I had that followed.
If there is one thing I hope to help my children learn in this life, it is to recognize those promptings, and respond accordingly.
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